Differences of Opinion: Interests

I promised a few weeks back to provide suggestions and insight on how best to mediate disputes between two well intentioned parties.  You may remember the story of the two students fighting over an ancient tribal necklace.  This kind of dispute is fairly common in Azeroth, as I am sure you each have encountered.  Leaders are typically required to act in situations such as this to resolve the dispute to the betterment of each party and the group as a whole.

In my time at Da Doctas School of Medicine, I have learned that there is a strategy that frequently works well to resolve these differences.  This method has been fully tested and expanded by many scholars far greater than myself.  I only profess to utilizing the method to make our campus as peaceful a place as possible.  Generally speaking, the method involves identifying the interests of the parties involved, generating options that might solve the situation, and then using objective standards to come to a conclusion.  I will try to expand on each component and provide examples for clarity.

The first step in this process involves exploring and understanding the interests of the parties involved.  While their motives may seem clear on the surface, there are often deeper concerns or issues that are leading to the surface behavior.  Ultimately, disputes typically occur because two or more parties find that their core interests are not being met.  If one of the parties or a neutral mediator can explore what the core interests are, it is easier to find options to satisfy those interests.

Let us return to the pair of students and try to explore their interests in this dispute in more detail.  Our young troll healer has recently received a family heirloom from her mother to motivate her to succeed on campus.  We can conclude that she perhaps wants to display that heirloom to others.  Perhaps she wants to wear that heirloom about.  Yet we should consider that these are simply surface interests.  They illustrate a set of deeper interests that motivate her behavior.

Perhaps it is the case that she wants to feel pride in her culture.  Perhaps she wants to feel encouragement from her family.  Perhaps she wants to better understand her culture and this is one way to connect with it.  These are all deeper interests, and by understanding them, we open up possibilities and options to a resolution that we may not have considered exploring just the surface interests.

Let us consider the young prideful blood elf.  His family has a long history of noble service to his people, much of which has been in conflict with the trolls of the Ghostlands.  On the surface, his interests appear to be removal of the hierloom from his presence, regardless of the method.  He may have already considered simply moving it elsewhere, or even destroying it.

Again, looking at the deeper interests at play, I suspect we can conclude his interests may include expressing pride at his ancestor’s actions.  He may not want to be reminded of the failures of his people.  He may want to be reminded of his own ancestor’s successes.

A picture begins to form that demonstrates these two do not have interests or desires that are directly at odds with each other.  It is true that the outward behavior driven by their core interests is in conflict, the retention or removal of the heirloom.  But their core interests are not directly in conflict.  Each can explore options to have their core interests met that do not by definition prevent the other party from also meeting their core interests.

While this is simply the first step in this dispute resolution process, it is a critical one.  Without understanding the core interests of the parties involved, it is impossible to explore options that might satisfy each side’s core interest without violating the other party’s desires.

When next  a dispute breaks out amongst members of your organization, consider asking each group to more closely explore their interests in the disagreement.  What is each side most concerned with?  What does each side want out of the dispute?

In your mediation of the situation, continue to ask the question ‘Why?’.  Why does one party feel the way it does.  Why does one party want a specific outcome.  Asking the question Why recursively will allow you to better understand the motives behind a person’s actions.  That understanding can then play a critical role in exploring creative options that can satisfy both party’s interests.

With our next exploration of this little heirloom dispute we will be examining the role of options in finding a resolution.

Ghosthorn Dreamstalker
Lorekeeper, Da Doctas School of Medicine

On the Realities of Life

((Given that Arrens has directed traffic over here, I want to provide a quick out of character update on why no posts have appeared of late.  I will try to avoid the out of character posts in general, but this is better than silence in this case.

My family is currently going through a period where our family dog is dying.  He is in his last days, though is being surprisingly resilient in his ability to hang on to life just a bit longer.  I have obviously not been in the mood to write as a result of this going on.  I would prefer to spend my time with him in his last days.

To our family, pets are another member of the family.  As a result, this has been a very hard time for us as a member of our family slowly dies.  I will try to get more posts up in the coming days, and at least one I suspect from the perspective of an ornery Hunter and his take on the value of his pet companions.

Thanks for understanding all.))